wala lang... nagandahan lng ako dun sa bahay.

 

again.wala lang.

okay okay.. inaamin ko na. napaka-contrabida ko. lahat nalang ng tao sinasabihan ako ng contrabida. pati pari.

kasi nung holy week, nag-confess na ako dahil nalulunod na ako sa dami ng kasalanan ko. so after kong magsabi ng kasalanan, ayun, ang sabi ng pari, "napaka-contrabida mo pala,"

o db? pati pari nagsabi na contrabida ako. ewan ko ba. ngaun kasi palaaway ako para akong batang kalye. hahaha... joke.  seryoso, hindi ko mapigilan yung mga lumalabas sa bibig ko. lagi nlng comment o pambara. lalo na kay paul tsaka kay brian. sabi ko nga knina kay paul na pag-gising ko ang una kong naiisip makikipag-away na nmn ako. daily routine? hindi macocompleto araw ko kpag hindi ako humirit or hindi ako nag-make face or nag-roll ng eyes...

kahit na anung pilit kong tumahimik nlng at ikimkim ang uncalled for reactions? lumalabas sya sa mukha ko... ang nakakatawa pa eh, lagi nlng may nakakahuli sa kin na ngtaas daw ako ng kilay or umikot na nmn ang mata ko... hindi ko talaga mapgilan.

ngaun ko lang sinabi kasi ngaung araw na toilang beses ko tlga narinig yung, "bakit ba napaka-contrabida mo?"

tpos si smith lagi ngffeeling mag-evil laugh, hindi nmn bagay kasi halatang pilit..bwahahaha.. d kagaya ko, natural na natural..bwahahaha. joke. 

ewan..hahaha. pero ang weird kasi natutuwa ako dahil may roll ako sa buhay ng mga tao...

i'm your average everyday super-- mali, kontrabida pala. hahaha.

wala lang..ayun lang. 

oo nga pala..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAUL!!!

BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALDO (5-6), ABU (5-5) AND LAINE (5-5)!!! 

i just don't know why, pero there's something about now that's making me happy. i don't mean today.. i mean NOW.

as usual lonely na naman ako dahil summer na naman and ang feeling ko kasi kpag summer eh nagkakalimutan ang mga tao. ako lang yun ah. alam nyo naman ako madrama, ksp etc..

pero twing iisipin ko na nalulungkot at feeling ko all alone ako, meron tingling sensation? sa mind ko na hindi naman talaga ako dpat maging malungkot. and just because of the feeling sumasaya na ko.

pero up to now, hindi ko talaga alam ang rason ko kung bakit ako somehow "masaya". alam ko may underlying reason and i think i have an idea who/what it is. d lang ako sure. nasabi ko lang yun kasi alam kong masaya ako kpag ito ay nasa presence ko(tama ba to?)

malabo talaga ang feeling ko. hindi tuloy whole-hearted ang emo ko at hindi rin whole hearted ang pagiging happy ko. ang labo labo..sobrang mixed up. i'm partly happy, partly lonely and partly inis. 

hindi ko talaga alam. sobrang babaw ko nga ngaun eh. madali ako matuwa madali ako matawa basta kung may gusto kau mangyari sa kin like gusto nyo kong patawanin or paiyakin madali lang kasi sobraang babaw ko talaga ngaun.

wala lang share ko lang. haha.

miss ko na kau. all of you. wherever you are.

o db? drama ulit.

hahaha.. don't mind me. naka-usap ko kasi yung highschool friend ko kagabi, maybe it's also one of the reasons why i feel sad kasi d pa kmi ngkikita tpos naguusap kmi kung kelan pwede lagi nmn taliwas sa mga schedule namin. hay... i miss them a lot talaga.

hay..enough enough.

be happy.

be happy. 

...

...

*thinking of that thing...*

...

... 

ayan. ok na ako.

miss ko na kau! 

ay oo nga pala,

happy birthday to a certain someone bukas. 

iba talaga ang nagagawa kpag masaya ka... hay. biro mo, inaaway ako knina pero napigilan kong sumagot..as in kinagat ko yung lab at yumuko para lang hindi ako magsalita.. yup, iba talaga ang nagagawa ng pagiging masaya.

actually naiinis ako sa isang tao kasi... ewan. maybe it's the usual reason na... i can't say. baka matamaan. pero masaya talaga ako eh... kya nawawala ang inis ko.

nadagdagan pa ang reasons ko para sumaya...

natuto ako magbake!!!!

mababaw ako, natuwa ako nung natuto akong magcommute pauwi, at ngayon natutuwa ako at natuto ako magluto!!! este magbake pala. two very different things.

malaking accomplishment sakin yun ah! at ang ikinasasaya ko pa eh, successful lahat!!! as in.

like my APPLE BREAD PUDDING. hmmmm... sarap. nung first try medyo ok lng... tpos gumawa kmi ulit...MUCH BETTER!

it would've been better kung VANILLA ICE CREAM yung topping, but sadly, choco vanilla lang ang meron. ok lng, msarap sya khit wlng ice cream. yun yun eh!

hahaha

tpos habang ginagawa ko tong post na toh, hinihintay kong mabake ang aking brownies... hmmm...

nung first try din mejo whacked sya...san ngaun ok na. muka nmng ok. hahaha... wish my brownies goodluck!!

at syempre my ultimate source of happiness..

*sigh*

yun lang ang masasabi ko.

i'm getting worse because the situation's getting better. hahaha.

housewife mode nga daw ako sabi ni kat. para sa knaya.

OMG!

yeah riiiiiiight! 

ayun... i eenjoy ko muna ang brownies ko.

mmmm...sarap! 

weeeee!!!

hahaha... syempre masaya ulit ako. mukang wla ng araw na hindi ako masaya... and for once, hindi ako natatakot karmahin at bigla akong lumungkot or something...

weeeeee!!!!

may nakalimutan kasi ako idagdag sa list of reasons ko why i'm happy.. hindi na ako makakapagtext ng quotes or jokes (not that i do anyway. hahaha) kasi...

bago phone ko!

well, not really.

asa pa ako na bago phone ko. what i mean is, nasa akin na yung phone ni dad na K750i. yup. pareho nmn kmi ni lui ngaun. kasi si dad nakakuha ng N73 sa globe. libre. ayun syempre, as usual, pass down ang phone. so akin na si K750i.

weeeee!!

sa totoo lng mas preferred ko kasi si K750i kesa kay K608i. kaya ngaun na sa akin na!! bwahahaha.

wala tuloy laman ang inbox. wla akong messages. para tuloy akong loner. hahaha. 

tungkol naman sa bread pudding at brownies... pipicturan ko sana.. ubos na eh. hahahaha

can you believe it. kakagawa lng kahapon wala na ngaun. pra bang hindi sya nagexist at all.

kaawa-awa nmn ako. wla akong naabutan pag-uwi ko. ayun, ang lunch ko tuloy bread at orange marmalade.

takte. puro tinapay kinakain ko!!!

baka gawa nlng ako for lui's birthday, or sa pasukan.

weeeee!!!

ang labo ko talaga ngaun. i'm all preppy happy ewan!

nasisiraan na ako ng bait kasi umingiti ako magisa! hahaha

be happy everyone! 

may feeling akong may hindi ako nalalaman... wla lang feeling lang. alam nyo naman ako ksp.

sorry.

kung may kwento nmn kau jan, kwentuhan nmn tau. magdadala ako ng beer gusto nyo?

juk lang.

o sige.. brownies nlng. hahahaha.

guys, wag na malungkot. nalulungkot ako kpag may malungkot. db mababaw ako ngaun? nadadala ako eh. sige na... be happy!!

parang maging sino ka man.. tae. mamamatay si eli.

waaaaah!!!

ayan.. i'm all lonely again!

huhuhu...

hay... i better go stare outside my window again.

i can honestly say that i have been waiting for this day for weeks. no joke. WEEKS. ever since i saw its trailer, i've been waiting for the day i get to watch johnny depp do his... thing?

hahaha..

who wouldn't be excited to watch the last Pirates of the Caribbean movie? the last one was great. it left everbody hanging, wondering, pondering about a lot of stuff.

for example, how the hell did Barbossa live?

if it were just me, i'd watch it all by myself. but it's lui's birthday( by the way) so i wouldn't want to deprive him the right to treat us to watch this movie (++lunch maybe?)

hahaha. juk lang lui.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUI!! 

i just saw pirates of the caribbean again. for the second time in two days. i can now honestly say that i understand the plot. hahaha. i'm kinda slow so... yeah. i need to watch it two times for me to understand it.

hahaha..

actually i was just giving an excuse to see johnny depp again.

(spoilers ahead)

i'm over the whole will-can't-see-elizabeth-for-another-ten-years thing. i was sorta affected by it, the first time i saw it (being a hopeless romantic and all). i do hope there will be a 4th movie. there are rumors, but they say that it will take a few more years. kinda like the indiana jones movies. kiera knightley might not be in it, some say orlando bloom wont be.

are my sentences making any sense? sorry, i'm just too damn tired to think straight but i just have to blog about the delicious johnny depp. i'm kinda obssesed with him right now.

i just saw 3 pirate movies (plus another because i saw the last one twice) so i'm kinda hung-up on it.

can't wait for the next movie i'm going to be hung-up on. which is OCEAN'S 13. 

i love OCEAN'S 11. it's my favorite movie!! Ocean's 12 was kinda ok.. i didn't like the whole LE MARQUE(tama ba yan?) helping them steal the egg. the first one was cool because they thought of the whole thing by themselves. they didn't get any help from the the greatest thief ever.

it was really cool. 

plus... who can ignore it's all-star cast, right? 

i like smart movies. thus, i like crime movies. hahaha. lalo na yung nakaw-nakaw. hahaha.

my top 2 favorite movie: The Italian Job.

dun ko nakita ang dream car ko. may beloved mini cooper. hahaha. hay. pero i didn't like the movie just because of the car. that was a smart movie too. i liked the whole armored car through the street. ang cool! tpos yung minis sa subway!!! ang cool!

if i can watch OCEAN'S 11 for an entire day, i can probably watch THE ITALIAN JOB for just half a day. 

right now, my top 3's:  POTC: AT WORLD'S END.. ah.. grabe. i am so in love with johnny depp talaga ngaun.

so aun.

binabaling (lui oh!) ko lng ang attentin ng mga tao sa masaya kong buhay para d nila malaman ang tinatago kong hinanakit. bwahahahaha!!!  

i hope everything remains the same. i hate it when things change. i have trouble adapting to change. i hate awkward moments.

i've been doing it almost all my life.

can i keep it up?

how long do you think i can keep it up?

what about the 'what ifs'? 

is it really worth losing everything you have now?

is he worth it?

would i be wondering for the rest of my life if things turned out the way i wanted them to?

if things are going to change i want then to change according to how i want them to be. but that's not likely. so i'll keep things the way they are. if i can.

ohmigosh!!!

i just saw my yearbook.

isa lang ang masasabi ko...

yak!!!

i mean, i like looking young and all.. but that was too much. i looked like a 6th grade rather than a fourth year student. and it wasn't just me. EVERYBODY!!! I think i'm actually going to have nightmares after seeing those. ohmigosh!!! 

we all looked really different. grabe talaga.